|
| Foocha! is a non-profit Web site. We do it for kicks, not for cash. If you're interested in writing for the site, click here |
|
 |
|
|
 |
|
| Talk,
Jerry Carpenter,
15 January 1999 | |
|
| |
| |
|
An irregular slot for your regular TV boy perhaps, but the chance to veg for almost a week in front of the best television Japan can offer was the unrefusable offer only previously mentioned in gangster films. There’s so much to pick from, this is my top three (a tough pick from hundreds) of the lot. Apologies for my lack of titles, but the local letterage confused me.
GO MATRIX !!! – late night Tuesday.
Boy, do they like ‘The Matrix’ over there! So much so they’ve got their own special Matrix ‘entertainment’ show. A guy, dressed as Keanu in the movie, hides inside a wedding cake. In a back room, two chicks dressed like the chick from the film sit with a guy dressed like Larry Fishburne. Just like Larry Fishburne, but fat and Japanese. This lot keep in constant communication with ‘Keanu’ via a secret camera within the cake. Just as the happy bride and groom are about to cut the cake, someone shouts ‘GOOOO MATRIIIIIIX’, and ‘Keanu’ explodes out of the cake and goes into a pounding Japanese kareoke version of ‘Living La Vida Loca’. Everyone bricks themselves for a second then a moment later they break into thunderous applause. For the rest of the forty minutes, they go over how the stunt was pulled off. Every. Subtle. Nuance. Mind boggling.
THE ‘BEAT’ TAKESHI SHOW. – prime time Wednesday
You may know ‘Beat’. He looks like Brian Clough, and he’s best known over here as the star of a series of extremely violent police movies. Over in Japan, ‘Beat’ is a legend who does everything. Sing, dance, motor-race, juggle, the lot. The show I caught him on was a bit of a variety show you could say. The opening slot catches ‘Beat’ impassive in trademark bizarre headgear, educating himself in the edible areas of a cow. Cooks on the set prepare him each individual bit, and one by one and he tries them all. Yum. Next up ‘Beat’ asks a panel of foreigner scum who reside in Japan to moan about the Japanese people. On the opposite panel are a bunch of locals. Cue horrendously overheated slanging match. Things are wound up nicely with a game where a guy lying on a trolley has to catch rice fired from a catapult. For every good catch the hostess removes an item of clothing. Stars are matted on over her nips to keep things ‘tasteful’.
SEXY LADY COPS HOUR – late night Friday night.
Five sexy girls dress up in ‘police regulation’ short skirts and cleavage huggin’ tops. For the next hour these girls will sit and play fruit machines while the camera checks out their ‘progress’. The most compelling hour of TV I’ve experienced since the Robert Carlyle episode of ‘Cracker’.
Top Home |
|
|
|
|
